


Soft

by flippyspoon



Series: Pour Some Sugar on Me [22]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Friendship, M/M, Pre-Slash, monster fighting aftermath
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-21
Updated: 2018-05-21
Packaged: 2019-05-09 17:55:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14720859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flippyspoon/pseuds/flippyspoon





	Soft

Usually Billy could handle it. Usually. He didn’t know what made it different sometimes.

Fight monsters alongside The Party, get beat up by monsters, take Max home, get beat up some more for letting Max be out late and refusing to say where they’d been, and go to bed too fucking exhausted to even be angry about it…

He didn’t know why sometimes he felt like if he went home after swinging an axe around in a storm of black goo and toothy monster face-petals and screaming fourteen-year-olds only to have to face the wrath of Neil, that he might crack. In some ways he was stronger than he’d ever been. He didn’t feel the need to go beating the shit out of guys for no real reason anymore or to make Max feel small because he felt small. He would’ve mistaken that for weakness some months ago. Now he knew that was strength. But it made him feel softer too and he hated that part.

He blamed Harrington for it, all of it; Harrington, who he loved so much he knew he wouldn’t be leaving Hawkins unless Steve took himself away first. Harrington, who gave him looks sometimes that made Billy feel like there might be something going on beyond their weird, sometimes hard significant friendship…

It was two in the morning and he was still bleeding from minor head wound when he dropped Max in front of their house and said, “Go on in. I’m staying out.”

Max said, “It’s just gonna be more trouble later if-”

“Yeah, I know.” He ruffled her hair, tried to play it off. “It’s cool. Go on. Scram.”

He watched her get in safe and sound, saw a light flicker on, and sped off towards Loch Nora.

At Steve’s house, Billy parked and did not get out of the car. It was enough to be there at the house, it was a safe spot. Steve, he knew, was probably already asleep in bed, and Steve needed his sleep more than anyone Billy knew. Billy reclined his seat as far back as it would go and bunched up his jacket against the window and curled up. He felt too hard and too soft at the same time and his thoughts and his love for Steve rambled around in his head with no place to go and he didn’t sleep for a long time.

_Tap tap tap._

“ _Hey_.”

Billy woke with a jerk. His neck hurt, every muscle ached from the fight the night before. He still had blood caked along his cheek from when a demogorgon had slammed him into a tree, he had a cut by his eye, he was starving…

“ _Billy._ ”

Billy blinked and coughed and looked over at Harrington in his jammies and bathrobe, arms crossed as he stood outside the Camaro, frowning at him through the window as his hair blew around in the cold morning breeze.

Billy sighed and stepped out of the car and shivered in his t-shirt as he grabbed his jacket. He dug his pack of Marlboros out of a pocket and stuck a cigarette in his mouth.

“‘Morning,” Billy muttered, his voice raw.

“Did you seriously sleep out here?” Steve said, glowering as if Billy had perhaps threatened one of the kids again.

Billy shrugged and lit his cigarette. “Sort of. I didn’t actually sleep that much.”

“Couldn’t go home,” Steve said.

Billy grimaced at that, which was answer enough.

“And you couldn’t…” Steve huffed, threw his hands up. “You couldn’t knock on the door? Use the walkie-talkie? Throw a rock at my window?”

“Figured you were asleep,” Billy mumbled. He avoided Steve’s eyes, but when he finally glanced up they were angry.

“C’mon, you lunatic,” Steve said, tugging on his sleeve. “I’ll make you breakfast.”

Steve dragged Billy in the house and sat him down at the kitchen table and Billy propped his head on a fist as he smoked and watched Steve make breakfast. Steve, Billy knew, like to get up early on weekends (weird) and make himself breakfast and coffee and watch cartoons before his parents even thought about waking.

“Should’ve woken me up,” Steve said, setting a cup of coffee in front of Billy.

“So we can both sleep shitty,” Billy cracked. “Usually I’m out of the driveway before you see me.”

Steve stiffened and gaped at him, his too-big eyes bigger. “ _Usually_? How many times have you done this?”

“A few.” Billy shrugged and sipped his coffee.

“Why didn’t you…” Steve licked his lips and blinked and almost looked like he was about to cry. “Why didn’t you fucking wake me up? You’re my…you’re…my  _friend_. You’re… You can’t just fight alongside us and save our asses all the time and sleep in the fucking car-”

“Don’t be dramatic.”

“Don’t be an asshole!” Steve blurted, slamming his fist on the counter

Billy laughed a high, astonished little chuckle and threw his hands up in the defense. “Jesus! What’s the big deal?”

“You are my friend and I care about you!” Steve said, enunciating as if Billy was very stupid.

That brought him up short and Billy got to his feet, feeling edgy. He took a long drag. “Cut it out,” he muttered. He spun on his heel and looked out the sliding glass doors to the pool where fog was rolling in and it was starting to rain.

“You always do that,” Steve said, and came around to block his view of the fog. “Why do you do that?”

_You made me soft_ , Billy thought.

_Turned me bitch_ , he would have said a while back.

“Not doing anything,” Billy said around his smoke. He puffed and put it out in the ashtray on the table. “I don’t wanna fight, Harrington. You want me to bother you at two in the morning, you got it.”

“I do want you to bother me at two in the morning-”

“ _Okaaay_.”

“Can’t believe Billy Hargrove just stood in front of me saying ‘I don’t wanna fight,’” Steve said.

“Just…” Billy wanted to look anywhere at Harrington. “I go fight with you guys and it’s hard and it’s fuckin’ blood and goop and…and rocks and…teeth and..I go home and it’s like it’s just the same and I just, I want to…I want…” He rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands and felt ready to crawl out of his skin. “Don’t you just feel like sometimes you want to…you want to…”

“Billy,” Steve said softly.

Billy met Steve’s eyes just as he stepped up close and wrapped his arms around him and hugged him, resting his head on Billy’s shoulder. And all at once Billy felt as if a load of bricks he’d been carrying on his back had been taken away and he hugged Harrington back and closed his eyes.   
“You made me soft, Steve,” Billy said, voice cracking so badly he flushed pink.  


“Well, that was my plan all along,” Steve said, and didn’t let go for a long time.


End file.
